Sexual Polarity

The easiest way to understand Polarity in practice is to imagine the sexual tension in your relationship as an elastic band, with you and your partner holding opposite ends of that band. When you stand right next to each other, the elastic is limp and lifeless, just like your desire. But as you start to walk away from each other, you begin to create tension in the elastic band.

The first step to create Polarity is to deeply understand the Dragon (masculine energy) and the Tiger (feminine energy). Because to create Polarity, someone needs to be predominantly in their Dragon and someone needs to be in their Tiger.

In their simplest form, here are the basics:

• Dragon Energy is your “doing” energy. Your inner Dragon gets shit done. It’s the part of you that is competitive and driven by purpose.

• Tiger Energy is your “feeling” energy. Your inner Tiger uses intuition and sensitivity to feel and nurture the world around you. It’s the part of you that is untethered, wild, and radiant.

Within ourselves we have the ability to embody the Dragon as well as the Tiger. Yet at any given time, we tend to embody one energy more than the other. I call this embodiment our Dominant Energy. We are either a Dominant Tiger, balanced by a little Dragon…

…or we are a Dominant Dragon, balanced by a little Tiger:

We need counterbalance in our energy to function and succeed. If we were all Dragon, we would be overly aggressive and cutthroat, whereas if we were all Tiger, we would be uncontrollably wild and unhinged. It’s the balance of both energies that ensures we can remain in harmony with the world and each other. According to Taoism, that balance follows a 70:30 ratio: 70% of our energy is embodied by either the Tiger or the Dragon.

Whatever our Dominant Energy is at any given time, it attracts our energetic opposite. Together with a polar opposite partner, we feel complete, whole, “one.”